The past two weeks I’ve been tormenting myself with thoughts that I am way too openly emotional. I hate that about myself sometimes, that I feel things too deeply and too personal at times. When I’m upset over something, I make it a point to let the culprit know and sometimes, rather embarrassingly, the entire world. And my social media addiction doesn’t help – I am guilty of over sharing. The reality of it is this space counts as that too but oh well, I’m pretty sure not many know of this space’s existence. So just let me jot down my musings.
The thing is, I have been like this for as long as I can remember. I wear my heart on my sleeve. When I keep things to myself, it’s usually because pride has won the battle over my emotions. But usually, I choose to be honest rather than retain my pride. So as I was saying…the past two weeks I’ve been questioning myself why or if there was a way I could change this.
But then I came to the realization that that makes me true to myself. I don’t pretend to feel one way when actually I feel another. I think this is something that is rather lost in today’s society. Plus, wearing your heart on your sleeve helps you to filter out the people who really care and really matter. When your feelings are disregarded, then you know a person is not worth a second of your time.
So I guess…the moral of this little post is just simply be who you are, feel what you feel, and don’t ever beat yourself for it. A little reminder to myself as well. Most of the time, we are not in charge of our feelings. We cannot tell ourselves to feel a certain way. If the world wants to judge you for feeling a certain way, let them. Unless they’re important to you, their opinion is usually invalid.